tburn #5

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Accepted tburn #5

Post by Vesper on October 27th 2018, 7:36 pm

1. Username: tburn

2. Give us your personal statement (include who you are, interests, what you can offer):

First, let me clarify something: I made this application under the impression that I am no longer banned from the clan (despite all the dumb shit I did in the past). If I'm currently still banned, then feel free to deny this application, as I'm the one in the wrong.

If not, then here's a not so brief overview of myself:

I'm a 19-year old software developer that enjoys eating Chinese food, teaching & learning whatever I can, talking to others, playing basketball, playing piano, and wasting my weekends doing absolutely nothing. I used to play a lot of other instruments (violin, bass guitar, drums), but I can't anymore, since I moved to Delaware with only a keLet me yboard.

A year ago, I was really anime-heavy; some of my favorites are Re:Zero, Future Diary, Beyond the Boundary, Parasyte, and Seraph of the End. And my god, I really love Bleach. Like, forget what everyone else says, there were good arcs after the Rukia arc. The anime and the manga were both great imho. And Naruto is good as well (though I'm not up-to-date with Boruto).

I was also into smash (don't ask me who my main is). Back when I was in Job Corps, I had nothing better to do than to learn all the tech for Smash 4, just for me to not get a switch. I'm still looking for someone to convince me to buy one and pick the game back up. And I've never had the luxury of traveling out of the country but that's something I'd like to do when I'm older and more settled.

What can I offer? A jovial member that won't hesitate to give feedback, a serious member that jokes when the time and setting deems fit, and a member that will do his best to bond with the rest of the clan.

3. What games are you actively playing? Tekken, Nier, Red Dead 2

Other games I don't actively play:
- Black Ops 3
- GTA V
- Destiny 2

I'm open to trying any other games you guys play.
My laptop is shit, though, so don't expect me to be able to play every game you throw at me.

3b. Please list your username for those games (if multiple usernames, specify username for each game):

All games listed: iVesperX

I'm not actively playing PB2, but since I have a feeling that you guys want to see the alts I have (since the list has grown compared to that of my last application).

pb2 accounts:

main accounts:

inactive accounts:

ace 1 - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Ace%201&id=1274617
ty q - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Ty%20Q&id=1311375
chemicalx alt - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=ChemicalX%20Alt&id=1262130
zangetsu_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Zangetsu_&id=1314841
varyk - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Varyk&id=1489056
stryker_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Stryker_&id=1504120
anvatta - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Anvatta&id=1708748
x o - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=X%20O&id=1327856
xedrix - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Xedrix&id=1536735
zang - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Zang&id=1659491
phrixis - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Phrixis&id=1265162
chemical x - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Chemical%20X&id=1273976
terio - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Terio&id=1279379
ishard - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=iShard&id=1315201
qool - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Qool&id=1632497
burn_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Burn_&id=1286262
deadlyfire - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=deadlyFire&id=1310920
t burn - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=T%20Burn&id=1293498
tyquel_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Tyquel_&id=1625739
burngodz - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=BurnGodZ&id=1276510
deathgodz - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=DeathGodZ&id=1276508
thet - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=TheT&id=1332337
tbrun - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=tbrun&id=1709911
tyquel burn - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Tyquel%20Burn&id=1276514
cix - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=CIX&id=1553055
109- - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=109-&id=1553052
cx_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=CX_&id=1556194
t _ - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=T%20_
bat_ - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Bat_
vendetta_ - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Vendetta_
razorback_ - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Razorback_
mercury_ - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Mercury_

nimbus - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Nimbus
wolf_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Wolf_&id=1485072
nemesis_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Nemesis_&id=1494254
toshiro_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Toshiro_&id=1314842
aizen_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Aizen_&id=1487835
sosuke - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Sosuke&id=1314843
zakura_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Zakura_&id=1488146
maserati_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Maserati_&id=1613746
sasuuke - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Sasuuke&id=1645873
divine legend - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Divine%20Legend&id=1289914
just rq - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Just%20Rq&id=1311378
photoshock - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=photoshock&id=1311373
shock_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=Shock_&id=1648715
xixx - http://plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=XIXX&id=1702779
626 - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=626&id=1310922
irek_ - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=iRek_&id=1315205
f3ck - http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=F3CK&id=1289585

and I guess I'm the owner of this account now: http://www.plazmaburst2.com/?a=&s=7&ac=epicnajee&id=772020

accounts with no kills:

4. Are you currently in any gaming clans/groups? No

4b. What gaming clans/groups have you been in before? They're all PB2-related:

past clans:
rbu
kkfc
silence
gsa
vs
boa
godz
strike (neon, bloodline, psych, psychal)
geno
diablos
kalosis
yrn
katoteros
3t/v$vp

4c. What made you leave your past clans/groups? Again, all PB2-related:

reasons:
rbu - gave the clan to killa 2000
kkfc - the leader left the game
silence - I was inactive so I was kicked
gsa - I knew no one in the clan
vs - I was running another clan at the time and someone told me that I should be focusing on only one
boa - I knew no one in the clan
godz - honestly don't remember why I "left" godz. I feel like it had something to do with the group feeling futile but I'm unsure
strike (neon, bloodline, psych, psychal) - merged with other clans. I left Psychal to apply for boz
geno
   - (1) left to help my friends in psychal
   - (2) kicked for multiclanning
   - (3) very few attachments to the clan
diablos - died
kalosis
   - (1, 2) died
yrn
   - (1) kicked
   - (2) it was basically dead and I was the only one doing anything for the clan
katoteros - died
3t/v$vp - didn't have what I really wanted in a clan

5. Why do you want to join Biohazard?

Looking back at my old applications to BoZ, I never really had a solid reason of wanting to join other than "BoZ is very popular". I bullshitted replies, masqueraded as someone other than myself, and now, I still can't find a reason that would make anyone jump at the prospect of me applying. The only reason that I have to join is to get a feel for the clan's ambience, as I haven't had the luxury to say whether or not BoZ has the three things I look for in a clan and its members (meanwhile, none of the other clans I've been in have had all 3 simultaneously).

I'm not going to bash all the past clans I've been in just for sake of convincing whoever is reading this that I genuinely want to join. I am going to talk about where they have put me today and why I feel like BoZ is for me.

The first clan I actually feel impacted me was Psychal. As a sophomore in high school, there wasn't anything that I really got out of the clan. The only thing I got was a group of friends and peers - with which I didn't even bond as well as I could have. I don't think I learned anything that useful when in Psychal other than basic HTML markup; it was fun hangout, but that part of my life is over.

The next one would have to be GeNo. I had very tight-knit bonds to people in that clan and I gained interpersonal skills that I hadn't had before joining it. I was very loyal to the clan and am very grateful for the things I learned there.

The last clan that had a major effect on me - believe it or not - was YRN. Again, I pretended to be someone different than myself; however, during the midst of all of that, I did develop skills that would point me in the direction of my current career today.

Putting that all together, along with the things I learned from the professional development program I went through, I feel like I'm a point in my life where I can put together an application for BoZ correctly as well as do what I mostly failed to do in my other clans: bond with and appreciate other members.

6. Which members do you know in Biohazard? Kaos, Dwayne, Aero, X Mechanic

6b. How did you meet them?

Kaos - Instigated him when he led Unreal
Dwayne - not sure, some time during Psychal
Aero - we were in a clan together, though I never really got to know him
X Mechanic - first person I met on PB2

7. What country do you live in? United States

8. Extra comments/questions: I realize a few alts and clans have been omitted in this application. The respective reasons are that the accounts have been disabled and the clans were lies to seem like a more experienced player that I actually was.



I rarely change my discord name so if you have any personal questions, or just want to have a conversation, feel free to reach out - Vesper#5715
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Vesper

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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Reloadium on October 29th 2018, 3:06 am

Since i know that you do a lot of coding, would you be able to offer that to the clan if it was required/optional?
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by tryAero on October 29th 2018, 6:02 pm

You have a negative history and/or impressions on some members of the group. What makes you think that you wouldn't just become a disliked outsider of the group?
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Vesper on October 31st 2018, 2:30 pm

Reloadium wrote:Since i know that you do a lot of coding, would you be able to offer that to the clan if it was required/optional?

A recurring underlying reason for my leaving several clans was having to do 80% or more of the coding. It's such a drag when you have to resolve coding-related issues like chatbox design or forum reload speed and eventually you become the only one responsible for site maintenance and repair. I really don't want that to be the case were I to be accepted. And considering my standing with several of the current members, trust would play a big role in impeding me from doing anything of that nature in the near future.

I really wouldn't mind teaching other members how to code with HTML/JS, though; it's very fun to learn & use. That way, trust and being overworked wouldn't get in the way of me contributing to BoZ and its members.

Plus, the forum and site look fine. I like them as is.

tryAero wrote:You have a negative history and/or impressions on some members of the group. What makes you think that you wouldn't just become a disliked outsider of the group?

Some isn't all. I'm sure the majority of the members that have negative impressions of me either haven't met me or don't know me. With everyone else, it's a clean slate and I'll have full opportunity to make new and more accurate impressions of who I am today.

As for being a disliked outsider, I honestly don't see that happening. A lot of people in the group are probably as socially awkward as I am, if not more. So I don't see any issues trying to "fit in". But if that were to happen, I would do two things:  I'd 1) start actively looking for feedback to figure out why I'm disliked, and 2) reflect on every conversation I have with another member so I can empathize and try to understand what I could be doing/saying wrong, considering my acidic personality.

In the end, I wouldn't resort to leaving. I would try to rectify the broken relationships I have with other members (which I plan on doing, regardless).
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Dwayne on October 31st 2018, 7:18 pm

So you're showing some determination to join now, I am impressed.

If you haven't already realized why I stopped talking to you before I drifted apart, it's because I still don't like you. Change my mind on that, at least try to. I want to know what makes you think that you are a more different person than before, especially back in when you were in GeNo because I was probably closer to you than anybody that are currently a member of BoZ right now.

You have 2 Discord accounts that are very active in many chats. It's doubtful to me that you will spend half the time you spend on these chats if you join us and get access to our chat.
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Vesper on November 1st 2018, 1:54 am

Dwayne wrote:So you're showing some determination to join now, I am impressed.

If you haven't already realized why I stopped talking to you before I drifted apart, it's because I still don't like you. Change my mind on that, at least try to. I want to know what makes you think that you are a more different person than before, especially back in when you were in GeNo because I was probably closer to you than anybody that are currently a member of BoZ right now.

Yeah, I'm not gonna lie; I was very carefree at the time of your departure from GeNo. I didn't take the feedback you gave me and I didn't come to regret that until well after you left. Looking back, I don't have an excuse for how I was; in fact, I'm pretty much the same, save the following two things:

I have higher emotional intelligence.

Before, when conflict arose, I did care about the people involved and I often tried empathizing with them - except when the conflict involved me. 9 times out of 10, I never saw the other person's point of view and ended up either fighting them on the topic until I felt I had said enough, or ignoring the person altogether, giving them dry ass replies. I think everyone can say that neither of those options are ideal, especially when written down. I have gotten better at avoiding both of those options and truly putting myself in someone else's shoes, but by no means am I great at doing so. I still mess up occasionally and I'm working on thinking more before I act, both in real life and on the Internet.

I understand the gift of feedback.

I never really thought feedback was as powerful as it is until recently. I used to always take it as criticism, no matter how it was given to me. I've discovered, though, that feedback is the most powerful tool that we have as a cognitive species. It it's purest form (in the moment, genuine, and constructive), feedback doesn't do anything but help us improve ourselves and each other. It's very difficult to see someone else's perspective of you and your actions or to even know that they have a different perspective than you do. Feedback has that covered and I've learned to embrace it, flying gracefully like an eagle. I plan to bring and hope to find that "feedback"-based culture to BoZ as well.

Dwayne wrote:You have 2 Discord accounts that are very active in many chats. It's doubtful to me that you will spend half the time you spend on these chats if you join us and get access to our chat.

When I stopped playing PB2, I retired my Zeke discord account; I only use the Vesper one now and rarely at that, since I have no chats to talk in. Hopefully that changes in the future.
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Vesper

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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by tryAero on November 1st 2018, 4:43 pm

Vesper wrote:
tryAero wrote:You have a negative history and/or impressions on some members of the group. What makes you think that you wouldn't just become a disliked outsider of the group?

Some isn't all. I'm sure the majority of the members that have negative impressions of me either haven't met me or don't know me. With everyone else, it's a clean slate and I'll have full opportunity to make new and more accurate impressions of who I am today.

As for being a disliked outsider, I honestly don't see that happening. A lot of people in the group are probably as socially awkward as I am, if not more. So I don't see any issues trying to "fit in". But if that were to happen, I would do two things:  I'd 1) start actively looking for feedback to figure out why I'm disliked, and 2) reflect on every conversation I have with another member so I can empathize and try to understand what I could be doing/saying wrong, considering my acidic personality.

In the end, I wouldn't resort to leaving. I would try to rectify the broken relationships I have with other members (which I plan on doing, regardless).

Obviously, you don't have to be friends with everyone. If you look to make amends with people that dislike you (and you dislike), how would you react if they decline your offer to restart? How would you proceed with the rest of the members that happen to still be friends with the person you despise?
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Vesper on November 3rd 2018, 6:58 pm

tryAero wrote:Obviously, you don't have to be friends with everyone. If you look to make amends with people that dislike you (and you dislike), how would you react if they decline your offer to restart? How would you proceed with the rest of the members that happen to still be friends with the person you despise?

I'm not going to come in and start trying to befriend people that I have problems with. I'd get a feel of the water, first, seeing how those people react to me being in the clan/around them. I'll give that a couple of weeks before I actually do anything.

And it's not even about "restarting", per se. If I don't like them or vice versa, I'm going to focus on why that is and talk to them about how we can come to a common ground, at least to the point where there's no tension between us anymore. I'm willing to bet that if someone doesn't like me in the clan, it's for reason(s) that they won't just forget because I asked them to. It'll take a conversation and a consensus.

But if Person A doesn't want to make amends with me, then that's fine; I'd just talk to the mutual friends we have and see what the deal is. If that doesn't work, then the bridge between Person A and I is burned for the time being. If, over the course of months, things don't get better (which they should), and end up getting worse, then Person A is just an asshole. I'm not going to hate or spite them, I'm simply going to avoid confrontation with them. It wouldn't change how I approach their friends, either. If they're friends of mine, then cool; if not, then hey, they'll end up going through the same process with me eventually. Never hurts to try.
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Roxxar on November 7th 2018, 1:04 am

while we discuss your situation a bit more, try to tell us in your words why you think that we (or perhaps the pb2 community/other clans) have a negative perception of you, or at least what you think WE think of you.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Vesper on November 7th 2018, 4:41 am

Roxxar wrote:while we discuss your situation a bit more, try to tell us in your words why you think that we (or perhaps the pb2 community/other clans) have a negative perception of you, or at least what you think WE think of you.

In one sentence:

A cancerous, lying, entitled piece of shit.*



Correct me if I'm wrong, but there's really only a couple of reasons why anyone in or out of BoZ would see me that way:

- Cancerous - Because I've hung around and have acted like members in Nephilim, Itami, 3T, and the Plazma League community as a whole, this is pretty self-explanatory. Nobody wants to be around someone who constantly talks shit, has a giant ego, and disrespects anyone they feel like disrespecting. I understand how annoying that shit can be and I don't know why, but I don't see a reason to act like that online anymore.

- Lying - I mean, I lied. Multiple times. I lied three times in a row applying to BoZ as ChemicalX in 2015 and I lied again applying to YRN in 2016. When the facts caught up to me, I still just pushed them to the side and continued to lie to people in and out of YRN. Hell, I lied in this application. I haven't bought RD2 yet. In all seriousness, though, the truth is something I've given to BoZ in very few of our past encounters.

- Entitled - This might confuse some people, but I feel like someone sees this trait in me. Anytime I was denied from BoZ in the past, I just went straight back to Psychal/GeNo (or whatever clan I was in) and got instantly accepted back in. I multiclanned in YRN and they never kicked me out for it. And on top of that, I left YRN, applied to GeNo, and got accepted right back in. I haven't hit any real brick walls when it comes to application processes so it wouldn't surprise me if someone thinks I expect to always get my way.

- A piece of shit - See the three adjectives above.


I'm not going to go into why other people from the PB2 community have negative impressions of me, as they're listed above.


*I don't think everyone that has a negative perception of me sees all of these adjectives in me, but they most definitely see at least one.
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

Post by Rakasaac on November 9th 2018, 7:54 pm



Come to discord for further instructions.
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Accepted Re: tburn #5

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